I Can Handle It

Last night I found myself crying myself to sleep. I also found myself angry with myself for crying. Everything happens for a reason so I constantly find myself analyzing and evaluating my actions and decisions to make sure I am on the right track with what I want in my life. Lorraine is right when she says many people feel threatened by me because I am a truthful person. The way I figure it, it takes so many steps to keep up with a lie. The truth is simply just that...the truth. I pride myself on being truthful, tactful, and maintaining a high sense of integrity. When others carelessly call into question my character, I take it very personally. Last night I found myself thinking about one of my favorite quotes and how it fits into my life. The quote is that of Mother Theresa in which she said, "I know God won't give me more than I can handle but sometimes I wish he didn't trust me so much!" I love it! I know that I am a strong woman with a very strong personality. That's me. I also know that I am very patient. I believe the problem is that many mistake my patience for weakness. I am not weak. I used to be many years ago but I learned how to stand strong. In the latest incident that is still unfolding, several people who I thought had a decent foundation of moral character have turned out to be just the opposite...lacking in character. I will fight to clear my name of the wrongful and hurtful allegations hurled my way. I refuse to let the devil get his way. In my tears I find that I get the opportunity to release my frustration privately so that I can stand strong in the wake of public opposition. I meet with my advisor tonight. I am confident that I will be able to continue my project and successfully finish it in time to make graduation. More later.